Hey All,

Sorry I have been offline the last few days. I have been hunkered down for the most part. Cocooning, thinking, resting and reading.

Here is what I have been up to the last few days:

I meet with my cancer coach. That was interesting! I realized I am actually in a pretty good place and have set myself well for this “process”. She made me feel much more comfortable with my decision to take a leave from work (I have been struggling with that decision despite the oncologist and nurses telling me to do so.) She said it is rare that people work through breast cancer treatments – particularly since I am on dense doses. She stressed that this is a full-time job since besides the treatments and appointments you need to focus on trying to keep the body & spirit strong and fueling with good nutrition. She let me know where there are some fitness classes for cancer patients (people can’t show up sick, so relatively safe). She also told me about a program that helps patients deal with chemo brain (more on that later).

I was invited out to some friends for a lovely dinner on Saturday night. It seemed like the first real meal I had in awhile! I didn’t’ think I had an appetite but the company was great, the food delicious – I gobbled up every bite. I was even sent home with a care package of muffins and tea – people are so kind!! I was still quite fatigued Saturday so started fading pretty early and crashed as soon as I got into my pjs.

I managed to get out for another skate on Sunday with a friend. There were crazy snow squalls when we got there; people struggling to move forward. Rather than heading downtown and fighting the wind back we skated to the Hartwell locks and then skated the Dows Lake loop. By then the wind had died down a bit and the sun was coming out so we headed downtown. I managed to skate 15 km – with several rests along the way. I’m still much slower than my norm, but I was faster than Saturday and went further. I was quite exhausted by the time I finished. However, I didn’t have to sleep for fours hours to make up for it – did rest for most of the day, however. Good progress I would say!!

Sunday afternoon a friend dropped by with some delicious homemade soups which I have been enjoying for the last two days.

Monday I woke up at 4am and wasn’t able to go back to sleep. I had a mild headache and just wasn’t feeling hot. I took advantage of the early morning and started working on my plan to proactively fight chemo brain. This is particularly important to me since I think I have suffering from “pre-chemo brain” – same symptoms, no excuse!!! In the afternoon, a friend picked me up for another skate (15K). There was no wind to speak of, so the skate was much easier – the beavertail and hot chocolate helped. I felt much better after getting out.

I have been lethargic today so I felt music therapy was in order. This resulted in my new awesome playlist with 230 songs called “Mega Kick in the Ass Cancer” (it’s on Google Play).

I am almost finished Michele Obama’s book “Becoming”. Love, love, love it.
This woman is the embodiment of integrity, grace, intellect, beauty and class, not to mention commitment to the greater good. She really opens up and shares the stories of her life – growing up poor and black on the south side of Chicago; getting married and struggling to maintain that marriage; about motherhood; about being thrown into an amazing and terrifying position – one she never aspired to. She is just so open, real, and funny. I love her even more. A must read!!!

Even though my head has been shaved, the little that remains is continuing to fall out. Little bristles everywhere! Still hoping I keep my eyebrows and eyelashes!!

Not sure what I am “becoming” through this process, but I will be stronger by the end.

Time to get on my trainer. I think I will listen to this song

Lyrics

Breast cancer and chemotherapy
Took away her crownin’ glory
She promised God if she was to survive
She would enjoy every day of her life, oh
On national television
Her diamond eyes are sparkling
Bald-headed like a full moon shining
Singing out to the whole wide world like, hey